The Lonely vs The Loner Alone But Not Lonely Alone
An Insightful Series of Life Lessons That My Life Provided As I Lived Understanding Its Psychology and Philosophy Improving My Mental Health in The Process.
LIFE LESSON STORIES SERIES
A Loner Is One Who Never Feels Lonely Alone, One Who Feels So Needs Company in Relationships
I had always been a loner since my early childhood. But the majority of people needs other people around them whether friends or strangers, or even foes.
Alone But Not Lonely
This is a story of my return from a solo trek I had already completed.
I got caught in a snowy whirlwind on top of Rohtang Pass in the Himalayas
I was on my way back via Rohtang Pass when I got caught in a whirlwind on top of it. It was at a height of more than 13,000 feet above the sea level. The intensity of that freezing whirlwind went on increasing as I tried looking for a shelter around. But I found none as far as my eyes could see.
I decided to lie down where I was. I had thought it would push me less than if I kept standing in front of its rotating gusts. But it was of no help as it started rolling me along with my rook sac on my back. It was better keeping standing than lying down on its rocky surface.
Every single freezing gust of the whirlwind threw me away 10-15 feet to one side and then to another. It kept tumbling me wildly without giving any respite in between. My body was exhausted and I reached the verge of losing my consciousness. I came to feel it was the end of my life and I would be dead within a few minutes. I had been braving the whirlwind for half an hour by then. I had no strength left in my body anymore.
I was rescued by an army truck
As I was about to give in to my impending death, I suddenly saw an army truck passing by. I shouted at the top of my voice and started throwing snowballs in the direction of the truck. My shouts died down in the noise of the wind but my snowballs luckily drew the attention of the driver. As he looked toward me, I started waving my arms wildly above my head.
Within seconds, four men got down from the truck and ran toward me. Before I lost my consciousness, they had already supported my body in their arms.
Marhi, a shanty hamlet of roadside restaurants between Manali and Rohtang Pass
We got down at Marhi, a shanty hamlet of roadside restaurants between Manali and Rohtang Pass. It was at a height of 11,000 feet above the sea level. They made me lie down in one of those restaurants where they had burnt logwoods to keep it warm. I was served with a hot glass of sweet milk and taken care until I came to my senses actively. They suggested me to take rest and instructed the restaurant owner to take care of me. Later I pegged my tent and shifted inside it. Soon I fell deep asleep.
I was fully refreshed as I woke up the next morning in my tent covered fully inside my sleeping bag. By that time, the sun had risen quite high in the azimuth indicating it was late morning. I had slept almost for 15 hours like a log. I freshened up and stood out in the sun to soak its heat.
As I sat out in the sun outside the restaurant, I took out my mini folding magnetic chessboard
As I sat out in the sun outside the restaurant, I took out my mini folding magnetic chessboard. Then I started playing a game moving pieces from both sides in turns.
There was a white-skinned foreigner sitting on a nearby table having his breakfast. He found my style of playing from both sides in turns very interesting and innovative.
“How do you play from both sides against your own moves,” he smiled as he asked me aloud.
“I assume two different identities while playing from two different sides,” I smiled back looking at him intently.
“Don’t you find it difficult to switch identities so frequently?” he sounded curious.
“I don’t get emotionally attached to either of them,” I gave my explanation.
“But the two thinking minds are the same. Don’t both think alike?” he again put his point across.
“They think their best both the times from the angles of their pieces. Angles are what change them as two different minds,” I smiled extra-wide this time.
“Interesting!” he exclaimed and asked, “Could I join you from the other side?”
“You’re welcome!” I made room for him taking some of my stuff to my side of the table.
Alexandre from France joins me for chess
He got his breakfast shifted to my table and introduced himself to me. “I’m Alexandre from France. I’ve been trekking in the Himalayas for quite a few months,” said Alexandre.
“Alone?” I went curious.
“Yes, I always travel alone. It gives you a lot of freedom,” he expressed his opinion.
“And I always live alone. It gives you a whole lot of absolute freedom,” I expressed mine.
“Are you a loner?” asked Alexandre.
“I think yes. I never feel lonely,” I replied.
“Do you never miss your relations?” Alexandre curiously asked.
“No, I am so busy interacting with new people around that I don’t get time to miss my old relations. I like making new interactions more than missing old relations,” I smiled as I asked him back, “do you miss yours?”
“I have been trekking alone for the last five months, but I am not sure if I am a loner or not,” replied Alexandre.
By that time, I had set the chessmen for a new game to start. We made our initial moves quite fast. But soon the maneuvers on the chessboard started getting complex. Our moves went on getting slower and slower as they turned getting more and more complex.
A young couple kissing passionately outside their tent in snow
In the meantime, a young couple had come out of their tent that they had pitched nearby. As they came out, they started passionately kissing and hugging each other. Alexandre kept looking at them stealthily in between his moves. For me my moves were more important than stealing their love-making looks.
Alexandre’s attention toward them went on becoming more and more compulsive in between his moves. He had started taking a lot more time to make his next moves by now.
I needed to remind him, “It’s your move, Alexandre!”
“O yes,” he moved his attention back on the chessboard. But before he could make a move, his eyes had again turned toward them.
After a few minutes, I again reminded him, “Alexandre, it’s your move!”
“O yes,” he moved his attention back on the chessboard again. But then again, before he could make a move, his eyes had compulsively turned toward them.
After a couple minutes, I reminded him the third time, “It’s your move, Alexandre!”
Alexandre Starts Feeling Nostalgic Lonely Alone
He pushed the chessboard away as he said, “Let’s not play right now. I am missing my girlfriend back in Paris looking at this couple’s passion for each other. I’ll go back to France now and kiss her and hug her with the same passion.”
I simply smiled and said nothing.
“We have our farms in the outskirts of Paris. And she loves me as much as I love her,” Alexandre seemed like needing sharing his emotions with me.
I kept listening to him intently with a compassionate smile on my face.
He went on speaking, “I have realized I am not a loner. I miss my old relations very strongly. I need company with my relationships.”
I stood up, went up to him and hugged him compassionately.
“We will complete our game if and when we ever meet in life again,” Alexandre’s eyes had gone wet.
I laughed out loud saying, “That time it wouldn’t be another interaction between us like today. It would rather be a revival of an old relation that we have established today with our interaction here.”
Alexandre started laughing too!
We packed our bags and moved back to Manali together.
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